Broken Hearted Mamas

Tears are an unavoidable part of my line of work. Frequently, the tears are from a broken hearted Mama whose child is going into detention. If this is the first time, she is scared (terrified), confused, ashamed, worried, stressed and out of her mind with angst. She doesn’t know what will happen next. She doesn’t know if her child actually did what he/she is charged with. She doesn’t even know what the charge means. She doesn’t know if her child is going to be beaten or raped in detention (the short answer is, “no”). She doesn’t know how she is going to afford a lawyer. If divorced or otherwise separated from the child’s father, she doesn’t know what he is going to do and if he is going to use this against her. She was up all night and is exhausted. Her boss is unhappy with her for calling in to work. She just heard the prosecutor describe her child as if he/she were a crazed ax murderer (not understanding that is just how prosecutors behave at these types of hearings) and worries that the staff will believe every bit of it and feel justified in being cruel to her child. And she didn’t think to bring any tissue.
















I ALWAYS carry tissue with me to court. I am the self appointed tissue dispenser in the Juvenile and Domestic Relations Court. Rarely a day goes by when I don’t pass a total stranger dissolved into tears. After unobtrusively assessing the situation (because I don’t want to thrust myself into someplace where I’m not wanted or needed – and also want to avoid crazy people), I frequently walk up quietly, hand them a tissue with a smile, fuss at them a bit so that they know the rest of the world is sympathetic, for example, “Mama, what are you THINKING coming to court without a tissue!” Then I walk away so as to not make them have to come up with a reply. Every time I do that, I thank god that my own children never, EVER behaved in such a way that I am sitting in that mama’s shoes (thanks kids!).

So this evening, I whipped up a couple of tissue holders. It is a super easy pattern and doesn’t take anytime at all. Here is how they turned out.



photos - taken during the process of constructing the tissue holders